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Jesus Teach His Guys How Fo Pray

11 One time Jesus stay pray in one place. Wen he pau pray, one guy he teaching tell um, “Boss, teach us guys fo pray, jalike John wen teach his guys.”

Jesus say, “Dis how you pray:

‘Fadda,
We like all da peopo know fo shua how awesome you stay,
    An dat you stay good an spesho.
We like you come King fo everybody now.
Give us our food fo today an every day.
Let us go, an hemo our shame
    Fo all da bad kine stuff we do to you,
Jalike we let da odda guy go,
    An we no stay huhu at him
    Fo all da bad kine stuff he do to us.
No let us get chance fo do bad kine stuff.’ ”

An he tell his guys, “Tink! If you go one friendʼs house at midnite an tell um, ‘My friend, lend me three loaf bread, cuz my odda friend stay going on one trip, an he wen come my house, an I no mo notting fo give him fo eat.’ Den if yoa friend inside his house tell you, ‘No bodda me! Da door stay lock awready, an me an my kids stay in bed. I no can get up fo give you anyting.’ So, wat? I tell you, even if he yoa friend, he no goin get up an give you da bread. Still yet, cuz you no shame, an you stay aksing him, he goin get up an give you everyting you need. So I tell you: Aks, an you goin get. Look, you goin find. Knock, da door goin open fo you. 10 All da peopo dat aks, goin get. Da guy dat look fo um, he goin find. An da guy dat knock da door, da door goin open fo him. 11 If yoa boy aks you fo one fish, you give um one snake? Nah! 12 If he aks you fo one egg, you give um one scorpion? Nah! 13 Eh, you guys no good, but you know how fo give good kine stuff to yoa kids. Fo shua den, yoa Fadda inside da sky, he everytime good, an he goin give his Good an Spesho Spirit to you guys cuz you aks him fo um.”

Jesus An Beelzebul

14 Had one guy dat get one bad kine spirit, dat make da guy so he no can talk. Jesus wen make da bad spirit let go da guy. Wen da bad spirit let um go, da guy dat no can talk wen start fo talk. An all da peopo, wen blow dea minds. 15 But some guys say, “Nah! Was Beelzebul, da Devil. He da main leada guy fo da bad kine spirits, you know. Beelzebul, he da one wen give Jesus da power fo make dat spirit let go da guy, az why!”

16 Odda guys wen try fo trick Jesus. Dey aks um fo show dem someting awesome from God in da sky fo make proof who him. 17 But Jesus wen know wat dey tinking, an he tell um, “Da country dat go agains each odda, bus up itself. Da town o da ohana dat go agains each odda, no can stay strong. 18 If da Devil make his own guys let go da peopo, den he going agains himself. How he goin stay one strong king? I saying dis cuz you guys wen say dat I make da bad kine spirits let go da peopo, cuz dea leada guy Beelzebul give me power fo do um. 19 You guys say, dat da leada guy fo da bad kine spirits, he da one dat give me power fo make um let go da peopo. Kay den. Who give yoa guys da power fo make da bad kine spirits let go da peopo, aah? Da Devil give um da power, o wat? Not da Devil, dass fo shua. Yoa own guys goin show dat wat you say stay wrong. 20 But if I make da bad kine spirits let go da peopo, cuz I get power from God, dat show dat God stay King, an he stay hea now by you guys, an you guys neva know.

21 If one big moke get all his knifes an clubs fo guard his house, den his stuffs stay safe. 22 But if one mo bigga moke come, an bus him up, he goin take away da knifes an clubs. Da first moke wen trus da knifes an clubs, but da mo bigga moke goin rip off all da stuffs, an split um up wit his own guys.

23 If you no stay wit me, den you stay agains me. Da guy dat no work wit me, he ony work agains me.”

Da Bad Spirit Come Back

24 “Wen one bad kine spirit let go one guy, dat spirit go all ova da boonies fo find one place fo rest, but no can find notting. Den he say, ‘Eh, mo betta I go back to da guy I wen take ova befo.’ 25 Wen he go dea, da guy stay clean inside, jalike wen you sweep one house an fix um up. 26 Den da spirit go get seven odda spirits mo worse den him, an dey all go take ova da guy, an stay dea. So in da end, da guy dat had da bad kine spirit come mo worse den befo.”

Stay Good Inside Fo Real Kine

27 Wen Jesus say dat, one wahine from da peopo wen say, “Da wahine dat wen born you an nurse you, she da one dat stay good inside!” 28 But Jesus tell, “Da peopo dat hear wat God say, an do um, dey da ones dat stay real good inside!”

Show Us Proof!

29 All da peopo wen stay jamming aroun Jesus, an he say, “Da peopo nowdays, dey do bad kine stuff. Dey everytime like see proof dat I fo real. An dey no goin see um. Dey ony goin see one proof jalike da guy Jonah wen make befo time. 30 Jonah, he talk fo God long time ago. He wen make proof fo da peopo inside Nineveh town dat he come from God. O same jalike me, da Guy Dass Fo Real, I goin make proof fo da peopo nowdays, dat I come from God. 31 Wen da peopo dat stay hea nowdays goin stand in front God da Judge, da Queen from Sheba far away da sout side goin stand up too, an make proof dat da peopo dat stay hea nowdays, dey not so smart. Cuz befo time she wen come from far away fo hear wat da akamai guy, King Solomon, wen say. An look! Get one guy mo importan den Solomon stay hea now. Dass me! 32 Wen da peopo dat stay hea nowdays goin stand in front God da Judge, da peopo inside Nineveh town goin stand up too, an make proof dat da peopo dat stay hea nowdays, dey stay doing bad kine stuff. Cuz wen Jonah wen teach da Nineveh peopo, dey wen come sorry fo all da bad kine stuff dey wen do, an pau do um. An now get one guy mo importan den Jonah stay hea now. Dass me!”

Da Light Fo Da Body

33 “You no light one candle an den cover um up. You put um up on top one high place, yeah? Den everybody dat come inside da house can see da light. 34 Da eye jalike one lamp fo inside yoa body. So if you get good heart fo help peopo, dass jalike yoa eye okay an you stay all light inside. But if you one greedy bugga, dass jalike yoa eye stay no good an you stay all dark inside! 35 Make shua you get da light inside you, an you no stay dark inside. 36 So, if you get good heart inside you, an you not greedy, dass jalike you get light inside you fo shua!”

Jesus Scold Da Pharisee Guys An Da Teachas Dat Teach Godʼs Rules

37 Wen Jesus pau talk, one Pharisee guy wen aks him fo come inside his house fo eat. So he go inside, an sit down fo eat. 38 But da Pharisee guy see dat Jesus no wash first befo he eat jalike dem, an he tink plenny bout dat. 39 So da Boss Jesus tell him, “You know, you Pharisee guys, jalike you, you guys clean ony da outside a da cup an da plate. But inside yoa heart, you guys stay full a bad kine stuff, an you like stash everyting fo yoaself. 40 You guys no tink! Da One dat wen make da outside, make da inside too! 41 Give to da peopo dat no mo notting from da stuffs you get, an you know wat? Everyting goin come okay fo you guys, da way God see you.

42 “Auwe you Pharisee guys! You goin get it! You guys give God ten percent a everyting, even da mint, an da rue spice, an all da odda kine herbs. But same time, no bodda you guys if you no do da right tings, an you guys no mo love an aloha fo God. Mo betta, make shua you do da right tings, an get love an aloha fo God, an no foget da ten percent too.

43 “Auwe you Pharisee guys! You guys goin get it! You guys everytime like fo sit down in da spesho chairs inside da Jewish churches, an like all da peopo talk nice to you in da open market. 44 Auwe! Cuz you guys mahke inside, jalike da graves dat da peopo no can see, an dey walk on top um cuz dey donno get one grave dea.”

45 One teacha dat teach Godʼs Rules wen tell um, “Teacha, wen you say dat, you talk bad to us too.”

46 Jesus say, “Auwe you teacha guys dat teach Godʼs Rules! You guys goin get it! Cuz you like make all kine rules! Jalike you stack up big heavy kine stuffs on top da peopoʼs shouldas, dat real hard fo carry. But you guys no like help da peopo fo do wat yoa rules say, even litto bit. 47 Auwe you guys! Cuz you make nice tombs fo da guys dat wen talk fo God, but was yoa ancesta guys wen kill um. 48 So you show you tink dass good, wat yoa ancesta guys wen do. Dey wen kill da guys dat wen talk fo God, an you guys make dea tombs! 49 Dass why God wen know wat he talking bout wen he say, ‘I goin send um guys dat talk fo me, an guys I send all ova fo tell da Good Stuff, an dey goin kill some, an make oddas suffa.’ 50 So da peopo dat stay hea nowdays, dey goin get da blame fo all da guys dat peopo eva wen kill cuz dey talk fo God, 51 from da first one Abel to Zekariah. Dey wen kill Zekariah right inside da temple yard, wit Godʼs spesho place one side, an da altar da odda side. Dass right! An I like tell you guys dis: Da guys dat stay hea nowdays, dey goin get all da blame.

52 “Auwe, you teachas dat teach Godʼs Rules! You guys goin get it! You guys donno wat God say, an you no let da peopo dat like know wat he say find out. Jalike you guys wen take away da key fo open da door so peopo can know wat God stay say.”

53 Wen Jesus go way from dat place, da teachas dat teach Godʼs Rules an da Pharisee guys wen start fo gang up on him, an try fo make him tell dem all kine stuff. 54 Dey like trick him wit wat he tell dem so dey can bus him.

11 And it came to pass, that, as he was praying in a certain place, when he ceased, one of his disciples said unto him, Lord, teach us to pray, as John also taught his disciples.

And he said unto them, When ye pray, say, Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, as in heaven, so in earth.

Give us day by day our daily bread.

And forgive us our sins; for we also forgive every one that is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil.

And he said unto them, Which of you shall have a friend, and shall go unto him at midnight, and say unto him, Friend, lend me three loaves;

For a friend of mine in his journey is come to me, and I have nothing to set before him?

And he from within shall answer and say, Trouble me not: the door is now shut, and my children are with me in bed; I cannot rise and give thee.

I say unto you, Though he will not rise and give him, because he is his friend, yet because of his importunity he will rise and give him as many as he needeth.

And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.

10 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.

11 If a son shall ask bread of any of you that is a father, will he give him a stone? or if he ask a fish, will he for a fish give him a serpent?

12 Or if he shall ask an egg, will he offer him a scorpion?

13 If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children: how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him?

14 And he was casting out a devil, and it was dumb. And it came to pass, when the devil was gone out, the dumb spake; and the people wondered.

15 But some of them said, He casteth out devils through Beelzebub the chief of the devils.

16 And others, tempting him, sought of him a sign from heaven.

17 But he, knowing their thoughts, said unto them, Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation; and a house divided against a house falleth.

18 If Satan also be divided against himself, how shall his kingdom stand? because ye say that I cast out devils through Beelzebub.

19 And if I by Beelzebub cast out devils, by whom do your sons cast them out? therefore shall they be your judges.

20 But if I with the finger of God cast out devils, no doubt the kingdom of God is come upon you.

21 When a strong man armed keepeth his palace, his goods are in peace:

22 But when a stronger than he shall come upon him, and overcome him, he taketh from him all his armour wherein he trusted, and divideth his spoils.

23 He that is not with me is against me: and he that gathereth not with me scattereth.

24 When the unclean spirit is gone out of a man, he walketh through dry places, seeking rest; and finding none, he saith, I will return unto my house whence I came out.

25 And when he cometh, he findeth it swept and garnished.

26 Then goeth he, and taketh to him seven other spirits more wicked than himself; and they enter in, and dwell there: and the last state of that man is worse than the first.

27 And it came to pass, as he spake these things, a certain woman of the company lifted up her voice, and said unto him, Blessed is the womb that bare thee, and the paps which thou hast sucked.

28 But he said, Yea rather, blessed are they that hear the word of God, and keep it.

29 And when the people were gathered thick together, he began to say, This is an evil generation: they seek a sign; and there shall no sign be given it, but the sign of Jonas the prophet.

30 For as Jonas was a sign unto the Ninevites, so shall also the Son of man be to this generation.

31 The queen of the south shall rise up in the judgment with the men of this generation, and condemn them: for she came from the utmost parts of the earth to hear the wisdom of Solomon; and, behold, a greater than Solomon is here.

32 The men of Nineve shall rise up in the judgment with this generation, and shall condemn it: for they repented at the preaching of Jonas; and, behold, a greater than Jonas is here.

33 No man, when he hath lighted a candle, putteth it in a secret place, neither under a bushel, but on a candlestick, that they which come in may see the light.

34 The light of the body is the eye: therefore when thine eye is single, thy whole body also is full of light; but when thine eye is evil, thy body also is full of darkness.

35 Take heed therefore that the light which is in thee be not darkness.

36 If thy whole body therefore be full of light, having no part dark, the whole shall be full of light, as when the bright shining of a candle doth give thee light.

37 And as he spake, a certain Pharisee besought him to dine with him: and he went in, and sat down to meat.

38 And when the Pharisee saw it, he marvelled that he had not first washed before dinner.

39 And the Lord said unto him, Now do ye Pharisees make clean the outside of the cup and the platter; but your inward part is full of ravening and wickedness.

40 Ye fools, did not he that made that which is without make that which is within also?

41 But rather give alms of such things as ye have; and, behold, all things are clean unto you.

42 But woe unto you, Pharisees! for ye tithe mint and rue and all manner of herbs, and pass over judgment and the love of God: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone.

43 Woe unto you, Pharisees! for ye love the uppermost seats in the synagogues, and greetings in the markets.

44 Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye are as graves which appear not, and the men that walk over them are not aware of them.

45 Then answered one of the lawyers, and said unto him, Master, thus saying thou reproachest us also.

46 And he said, Woe unto you also, ye lawyers! for ye lade men with burdens grievous to be borne, and ye yourselves touch not the burdens with one of your fingers.

47 Woe unto you! for ye build the sepulchres of the prophets, and your fathers killed them.

48 Truly ye bear witness that ye allow the deeds of your fathers: for they indeed killed them, and ye build their sepulchres.

49 Therefore also said the wisdom of God, I will send them prophets and apostles, and some of them they shall slay and persecute:

50 That the blood of all the prophets, which was shed from the foundation of the world, may be required of this generation;

51 From the blood of Abel unto the blood of Zacharias which perished between the altar and the temple: verily I say unto you, It shall be required of this generation.

52 Woe unto you, lawyers! for ye have taken away the key of knowledge: ye entered not in yourselves, and them that were entering in ye hindered.

53 And as he said these things unto them, the scribes and the Pharisees began to urge him vehemently, and to provoke him to speak of many things:

54 Laying wait for him, and seeking to catch something out of his mouth, that they might accuse him.