8 Da guy Saul stay dea, an he tink dass good dey wen kill Stephen.

Saul Make Jesus Guys Suffa

Dat same day dey wen start fo make all da peopo suffa plenny dat wen come togedda fo church Jerusalem side. So all da peopo dat wen trus da Good Stuff From God wen go all ova Judea an Samaria. But da twelve guys Jesus wen send neva go way. ² Some guys dat trus God an do wat he say wen bury Stephen, an dey sad an crying real hard cuz he wen mahke.

³ But da guy Saul wen start fo wipe out da peopo dat come togedda fo church. He wen go inside all da houses, an he drag away da guys an da wahines, an throw dem inside da jail.

Philip Teach Da Good Stuff Samaria Side

⁴ Jesus guys dat wen go all ova wen teach wat God say inside all da places dey wen go. ⁵ Philip wen go one big town inside Samaria, an teach da peopo ova dea bout da Spesho Guy God Wen Send. ⁶ All da peopo dea wen hear Philip, an dey wen see all da awesome stuff he wen do dat show wat kine guy him, so den dey wen listen real good to da stuff he wen say. ⁷ Plenny bad kine spirits wen make big noise an let go plenny peopo. Plenny peopo dat no can move an no can walk wen come good. ⁸ So everybody dat town wen come real, real good inside.

Simon da Kahuna Guy

⁹ Had one guy name Simon dea dat wen make kahuna dat town. An all da Samaria kine peopo, wen blow dea minds cuz a him. He wen say he one big shot, aah. ¹⁰ All da big guys an da odda peopo wen listen to him real good an say, “Dis guy, he da guy dey name ‘Da Big Power From God.’ ” ¹¹ Dey wen stick wit him cuz he stay blow dea minds long time, cuz he wen make da kahuna kine stuff. ¹² But Philip wen teach da peopo dea da Good Stuff bout how peopo can get God fo dea King, an dat Jesus, he da Spesho Guy God Wen Send. So da guys an da wahines wen trus wat Philip wen say, an he wen baptize dem. ¹³ Simon, he wen trus Jesus too, an Philip wen baptize him. An Simon wen stick wit Philip all da places he wen go. Philip wen do all kine awesome stuff dat show da power he get, an wen blow Simonʼs mind.

¹⁴ Da guys Jesus wen send, dey wen stay Jerusalem side. Dey wen hear dat da peopo Samaria side wen trus wat God wen say. So dey wen send Peter an John ova dea by dem. ¹⁵ Wen Peter an John come, dey wen pray fo da peopo, so dey can get Godʼs Spesho Spirit. ¹⁶ Cuz Godʼs Spesho Spirit neva take charge a da peopo dea yet. Dey wen get baptize cuz a da One name Jesus ony. ¹⁷ Den Peter an John wen put dea hands on top everybody, an den Godʼs Spesho Spirit wen take charge a dem.

¹⁸ Simon wen see dat Godʼs Spesho Spirit wen take charge a da peopo wen da guys Jesus wen send wen put dea hands on top dem. He wen try give dem money, an he say, ¹⁹ “You can give me da power too, so dat wen I put my hands on top da peopo, Godʼs Spesho Spirit goin take charge dem?”

²⁰ Peter wen tell him, “You an yoa money goin mahke togedda! Cuz you tink dat you can buy Godʼs gif wit yoa money! ²¹ You no can work fo God wit us, cuz God see yoa heart no stay right. ²² You betta come sorry cuz a dis real bad ting you wen do, an aks da Boss if he can hemo you from da bad kine stuff you tinking! ²³ Cuz I know you stay real jealous an nuha deep inside, an you stay all tie up wit da kine stuff dat no stay right.”

²⁴ Den Simon wen tell Peter an John, “You can pray to da Boss fo me, so dat all dis stuff dat you wen say no happen to me?”

²⁵ Den Peter an John wen tell da peopo wat God wen do fo dem, an dey wen teach wat God wen say. Den wen dey going back Jerusalem side, dey wen teach da Good Stuff From God inside plenny small towns Samaria side.

Philip An Da Guy From Etiopia

²⁶ One angel guy from da Boss wen tell Philip, “Go sout to da road inside da boonies dat go from Jerusalem to Gaza.” ²⁷ So Philip wen go, an he come by one eunuch guy dat no can marry from Etiopia. He one real importan guy dat stay in charge a all da money fo Queen Candace from Etiopia side. Dis guy wen go Jerusalem fo go down an pray to God. ²⁸ Now he going home, an he sitting inside his carriage. He was reading da book dat Isaiah wen write, da guy dat wen talk fo God befo time. ²⁹ Godʼs Spesho Spirit wen tell Philip, “Go by dat carriage, an stay near um.” ³⁰ Philip wen run ova dea, an hear da guy reading Isaiahʼs book. Philip wen aks da guy, “You undastan wat you reading, o wat?”

³¹ Da Etiopia guy wen say, “I no can undastan um if nobody tell me wat dis mean.” Den he tell Philip fo climb inside da carriage an sit down by him. ³² Da place inside da Bible wea he wen read say,

³⁴ Da guy wen tell Philip, “Please, tell me who Isaiah stay talking bout. He talking bout himself o one nodda guy?” ³⁵ Den Philip wen teach him. He wen start in dat place wea da guy was reading inside da Bible, an wen tell him da Good Stuff Bout Jesus. ³⁶ Dey stay going on da road, an dey come by some water. An da guy wen say, “Look ova dea! Get water. You can baptize me, yeah?”

³⁷ [Philip wen tell him, “I can baptize you if you trus God inside yoa heart fo real kine.”

Da guy wen say, “I trus dat Jesus, he da Spesho Guy God Wen Send. He Godʼs Boy.”] ³⁸ Da guy wen tell his worka guy fo make da carriage stay dea. Den Philip an da guy wen go down inside da water, an Philip wen baptize him. ³⁹ Wen dey wen come outa da water, right den an dea da Bossʼs Spesho Spirit wen take Philip away. Da eunuch guy neva see Philip any moa, but he wen stay going an he feel real good inside. ⁴⁰ Den Philip wen show up Azotus side, an he wen go all da towns, teaching da Good Stuff From God. An den he go Cesarea side.