He brought a wise woman from Tekoa and instructed her. Joab: Act like you are in mourning. Wear mourning garments, don’t anoint yourself with sweet-smelling oils, but act like a woman who has been mourning for someone dead for a long time.

No, my counsel is to take your time. Gather the people of Israel, from Dan to Beersheba, so that you have a large army, like the grains of sand on the beach, and lead them into battle yourself.

I am 80 years old today. My judgment is not as good as it used to be. I can’t taste my food, enjoy my drink, or even hear the pleasant singing of men and women. So why should you burden yourself with me, my lord and king?