⁶ Instead, I suffer if I defend myself,
    and I suffer no less if I refuse to speak.

¹⁵ I have been sick and close to death since my youth.
    I stand helpless and desperate before your terrors.
¹⁶ Your fierce anger has overwhelmed me.
    Your terrors have paralyzed me.
¹⁷ They swirl around me like floodwaters all day long.
    They have engulfed me completely.
¹⁸ You have taken away my companions and loved ones.
    Darkness is my closest friend.

¹ I cry out to God; yes, I shout.
    Oh, that God would listen to me!
² When I was in deep trouble,
    I searched for the Lord.
All night long I prayed, with hands lifted toward heaven,
    but my soul was not comforted.
³ I think of God, and I moan,
    overwhelmed with longing for his help. Interlude

⁴ You don’t let me sleep.
    I am too distressed even to pray!
⁵ I think of the good old days,
    long since ended,
⁶ when my nights were filled with joyful songs.
    I search my soul and ponder the difference now.
⁷ Has the Lord rejected me forever?
    Will he never again be kind to me?
⁸ Is his unfailing love gone forever?
    Have his promises permanently failed?
⁹ Has God forgotten to be gracious?
    Has he slammed the door on his compassion? Interlude