How to Ruin Your Child in 7 Easy Steps

The Power of Acceptance

Read Matthew 6:25-34.

The best way to avoid ruining your child with envy is to deal with envy in yourself. And the critical step in that battle may be to accept the way God designed you. As Pastor Andy Stanley says, acceptance fuels influence. You can’t influence your kids if you can’t accept them, and you can’t fully accept others until you have accepted yourself.

After all those years of being called Bugs Bunny, I finally got my teeth fixed. But every time I smile I am reminded of the self-rejection I felt as a boy. Instead of reliving the pain, though, I choose to use it as a reminder of how much God loves and accepts me, even with my self-proclaimed imperfections. And I try to use it as a reminder to be sensitive toward the self-rejection others may be feeling, motivating me to share God’s love and grace with them.

So I’m grateful for crooked teeth. I guess you could say my being a Bugs Bunny look-alike taught me how to overcome envy.

What about you? Are you grateful for the “crooked teeth” in your life, or are they driving you to envy others? I’ve named some of the crazy things people are driven to do when they don’t feel worthy or adequate, and maybe you recognized yourself in that list. Maybe you know it’s time to deal with the root of self-rejection that is driving your life down the path of envy and threatening to destroy your children with you.

Here’s what I want you to do: make a list of your unchangeable features, the facts about how God designed you. Your parents, brothers, sisters, physical appearance, ethnic background, aptitudes, abilities, skills, talents, and educational opportunities. Can you look at yourself in the mirror and agree with God that His creation is “very good”?

Next add to your list the scars that have come into your life. Things people did that caused you hurt or shame.

Now take some time to reflect on God’s greatness and God’s goodness.

*Do you really believe God is love? Do you believe you have a wise, sovereign, all-powerful Creator? Do you believe God “causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose”?